—by by Pamela Patton
(From our collection of service openers)

I was raised a strict Catholic. Church on Sundays and C.C.D. (to us, an acronym for “Catholic Cool Dudes”) on Saturdays. My parents tried their best to make me a good Catholic, but things started looking grim in the second grade when I experimented by ending my prayers with “Awomen.”

While away at boarding school and college, I continued to attend Catholic Mass regularly, but I began an intellectual quest for something that made more sense to me. I stumbled for years until I discovered Unitarian Universalism. This discovery was exciting, but for a while mostly an academic one for me. After I moved to New York and started attending All Souls, it wasn’t long before the intellectual satisfaction of being a Unitarian spread to my heart.

Now, I find that I become emotionally unwound when I walk through these doors. Though the service and other offerings of this community are, without a doubt, intellectually compelling, the sadness and joy in my heart rise to the surface here. A reading, a musical piece, a sermon puts me more in touch with my longing to talk to my dad who died eight years ago, makes me feel the part of my heart that was broken by a sad and confusing divorce, makes me bask in the bountiful good fortune of being remarried to a wonderful man, and makes me shudder with the pride of motherhood.

But it’s not just the elements of the service. It’s being surrounded by all of you—you who are contemplating your own tragedies, you who radiate your own pride and joy, you who have thoughtfully and lovingly made a home of All Souls.

When I started coming here ten years ago, I sat in the back corner and I didn’t know anyone else. Now, I sit in the front. Though it’s still the case that I know only a few members of the congregation, I am so grateful that I am here with all of you and that I have found a place where both my heart and my mind are supported and nurtured.